My special place

[creative_writer]

@Snowie glad to hear you were able to get relief from talking to your psych. Remember with EMDR you can also let your psych know if it does ever get too much for you. I hope you’ve been able to rest up this afternoon. A therapy session can take a lot from us. That’s why I prefer scheduling mine in the afternoon, after I’ve got some uni stuff out of the way. Always good to give yourself that space and love 🥰

[Snowie]

We did do some EMDR before I got admitted so it was just continuing from that @creative_writer I do know that I have to be in a good place mentally to be able to do it, or else I get too upset/distressed. It does take a lot out of me, and I do struggle with energy/motivation for the remainder of the day. I always find it ends up being an "easy" day. She's given me some 'homework' to do too, so I will see how I go. I see her again in a fortnight.

How have you been going?

[creative_writer]

@Snowie sometimes we do need to be kind to ourselves and take it easy. Emotions can be very heavy and exhausting. It’s good that you are seeing her regularly.

I’m drained, it’s just that time of semester with so much to do.

I also need to start looking for a new psych too, not sure where to start to be honest. They’re so expensive

[Snowie]

I always find psych days to be quiet @creative_writer I never plan other things on those days. I normally just take it easy.

Finding a new psych can be hard work, especially when we have to find the right fit for us. It can be really difficult and expensive. They cost so much just to attend one appointment, let alone continuing to see them. Then you want someone fairly close too, so you don't have to travel too far to see them. I really hope you can find a psych that fits for you.

No doubt you are at a busy time in the semester, especially with the end of the year creeping up on us. I hope you are able to stay on top of it all.

[creative_writer]

@Snowie we all need self care after a heavy therapy session. Therapy is hard work, you are processing so much.

It is very hard to find a psych and then you don’t know if it’s going to work out. My beliefs on mental illness have also changed, I have found some psychs take a rather clinical approach and unconsciously believe mental illness = abnormality. Even the more biological mental illnesses can have a trauma component. Trauma can trigger Schizophrenia or bipolar episodes. The whole notion of “abnormality” is stigmatised and dated and puts too much blame of the person with mental illness

[Snowie]

Therapy is hard work @creative_writer I guess if it wasn't hard work than it wouldn't help us.

It has taken me awhile to find a psych that I seem to 'gel' with. I do believe that we go through a few to find the one, and then once we find the one, we have to hope that they stick around.

I've had 3 psych's and they have all had different approaches to my therapy. But then again, I have been in different stages of my mental illness too. I guess there are a lot of factors that we have to take into account.

[creative_writer]

@Snowie I feel like our goals change and so do our needs. I also feel as though sometimes we outgrow our therapists. I didn’t feel as though my psych was connecting with me at the same level anymore. Though realistically I don’t want to be in therapy forever. I know CPTSD and Bipolar often mean long term work on self. I found SANE counsellor more helpful. Just trying to figure out what I’m going to do once the sessions end. I finish up with the guided service at the end of this year.

Hard work helps us heal, you’ve gotten so far, I hope you remember that 💖

[Snowie]

You are certainly right @creative_writer our goals and needs certainly change over time.

It's good that you found the Sane counsellor helpful and that you were able to connect with them. I don't think it matters how we connect with that 'person' as long as we do. Hopefully after the guided service ends you can find something/someone else. Is it possible to use the guided service again?

No, therapy isn't something I want to do forever but I guess at this stage I just see it as something that I need at the moment. 

[creative_writer]

@Snowie finding someone we connect with is really important. I’ll need to look for someone else. You can only rejoin the guided service after a year has passed.

It is true sometimes we need therapy, but it might not always be this way. I’ve been in therapy on and off for the past 12 years. At one point I wasn’t even seeing a psychiatrist and just getting med refills from the GP. I’ve seen a few psychologists on and off over the years

[Snowie]

oh that's a shame about the guided service @creative_writer I guess in one way it lets other people join but if it's helping than you should be able to continue it.

I have been lucky that I have only had the one psychiatrist. 

I guess at different stages of our journey we need different things. At this stage I know I need a psych and a pdoc. Maybe that might change with time.